Tonight's Special: Ballz

A blow to underaged license scratchers everywhere:

Ontario introduces new secure driver's license

Sorry all you undeRAGERS. I guess you're gonna have to continue... getting me to buy all your alcohol. FUCK. I never win.

In other news, I saw a Chinese restaurant owner placing bets with his bookie tonight in the owner's restaurant. I think it's some kind of unwritten Chinese restaurant owner code. I guess I'll never know the code, seeing as the chances of me owning a restaurant anytime soon are very slim. It also helps if I was actually Chinese.

In a related story, a High Court judge in London has ruled that a widow's 1994 will leaving $21 million dollars to the husband and wife owners of a Chinese restaurant northeast of London was legal. Which brings us to tonight's quick:

BALLZ OF STE-

Who's got a pair of grapefruits today? The five nephews and nieces of the $21 million dollar widow. They claimed their aunt suffered from dementia and wanted the will to be declared invalid and asked the judge to give the inheritance to them. The judge, however, accepted the restaurateurs' evidence that after death of the woman's husband and son, she became like a family member to the couple. They even went on holidays together and got together frequently at th restaurant and at the woman's apartment.

I dunno, maybe if the nephews and nieces spent more time with the woman, they might have been written into the will too; however, they had the walnuts to demand the will was invalid AND claim their aunt was mentally instable. The five nephews and nieces of the $21 million dollar widow, you all have some Ballz of Ste-