2008: Year of the Awesome

(Allow me this sentimental post and I promise I'll get back to more sperm videos soon).

As I sit here on a Greyhound bus speeding through somewhere in Michigan, I'm reminded about how great the past year was. I started the year off in Chicago and ended it in the city where I started. In between were 365 days, each day miraculously surpassing the events and good time of the day preceding it. I've spent the past year in different cities, provinces, states, and countries in different homes, venues, bars, and places. From holding an Oscar in Times Square, New York City, to getting splattered with blood at Evil Dead: The Musical in Toronto. From surfing on tables to the sounds of Brian Wilson at Bluesfest in Ottawa to going absolutely out of my mind at Umphrey's McGee in Chicago.

The following are just a few of my favourite things in 2008 (some of which are “braggy” but some of which you, the loyal reader, should check out or go to if you have the chance):

Moments:
1) NYE Chicago Run

and then in reverse chronological order:

Getting Obama'd at La Maison
Not My 101 Week
Folk Festival
Bluesfest
Summer Southern Ontario Swing
Reading Weekend in New York

Concerts:
1 of the year and of my life) Umphrey's McGee - 2008-12-31 - 2009-01-01
2) Umphrey's McGee - 2008-12-30
2) Umphrey's McGee - 2008-12-29

and then in no particular order:

Basia Bulat @ Zaphods
Kathleen Edwards/The Fugitives @ The Black Sheep Inn
Wyclef Jean/Akon @ Bluesfest
Coldplay/Stars @ Scotiabank Place
Great Big Sea @ Heart and Crown
Born Ruffians/Ruby Coast @ School
Broken Social Scene/Dala @ Folk Fest
The Frequency @ Bluesfest

Albums (in no particular order):
My Morning Jacket - Evil Urges
For Emma, Forever Ago - Bon Iver
Viva La Vida - Coldplay
The Rhumb Line - Ra Ra Riot
Asking For Flowers - Kathleen Edwards
We Sing, We Dance, We Steal Things - Jason Mraz
Vampire Weekend - Vampire Weekend
A Good Day - Priscilla Ahn
Punch - Punch Brothers
Hammerstrike - Lotus
Original Soundtrack - Dr. Horrible's Sing-A-Long Blog
Original Broadway Cast Recording - Passing Strange

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All my thoughts divided

All my friends divided

All my worlds divided, it’s gone so far

All these ways divided

All these thoughts divided

When all our roads are spoken for

Then it fades, far gone

Last night, as Brendan Bayliss of Umphrey's McGee sand these words to close out the best concert I have ever attended, I was moved to tears. Many, many miles divided me between most of my friends while inches divided my between some others. As corny as it sounds, you were all right there with me, saying goodbye to the old and looking forward to the new.

To all the friends and people I've come across this past year, old and new, I'm eternally grateful and thankful from the bottom of my (admittently sometimes cold and cruel) heart. It’s because of all of you that made 2008 a year I won’t soon forget.

BUT 2009 is a new year and as amazing as 2008 was, I’m excited about what each of these next 365 days will bring for me, for you, and for the world at large. I expect to be sitting somewhere at this very same time next year writing virtually the same entry, only with different memories, events, and all around good times.

Here we go again.

No Really... I'm Back

Ok, so I know I promised I would keep up the blog and that new entries would be plentiful. I lied. You're going to have to accept the fact that people on the internet lie. That "HOT AND HORNY" girl on MySpace? She's not actually hot. She's most likely not even a girl! Ahhhh trusty non-trustworthy internet. How I missed your spaces to blog from.

I'm going to take a page out of Andrew Keenan-Bolger's Blog (you should all check it out. He's currently on the National Tour of Spelling Bee [which stops in Ottawa in May] and his blogs and vlogs about his road life are great. Maybe our blogs might cross paths in May...). I'm going to start posting again but it's not going to be everyday. Everyday blogging just tires out the creative juices in my head. A lack of juice in my body doesn't bode well for anyone. Speaking of which, I need some orange juice.

Get Up, Stand Up

I've been bad. I promised to write, but I haven't. I swear, I've been really busy. I was just about to write this really long thing about a controversy that's going on at UofO, but when I went and searched the Fulcrum articles that provides the information about said controversy, I was presently surprised to see that someone has already written a nicer and more concise version of what I was just about to write. Therefore, instead of writing the exact same thing, I will link to the article:

Bilingualism requirements dash the hopes of another crop of SFUO candidates

I have always been very clear on my own personal views about this issue, and issues like it: anyone, regardless of age, sex, race, nationality, sexual orientation, or language, should be able to do or achieve whatever he or she chooses to do. It's in our freakin' constitution. Last time I checked (and with no disrespect meant to any French-speaking people), all those rights come before the section on the Official Languages of Canada, and the only province, constitutionally, that is required to use both Official Languages in the education system is New Brunswick.

Anyone speaking either English OR French should be able to run for the SFUO, a student association in a school that's located in a province that's not New Brunswick. Let we, the people, decide who should represent us. If they are qualified, let we, the students, vote on the person we want in our office based on their platform and their kick-ass free stuff and gimmicks. Since birth, we've been taught that the most important and privileged things about living in Canada is our freedom, our rights, and our democracy. What this situation proves is that the inherent principles of our rights, freedoms, and democracy are no matter within the confines of the University of Ottawa, a scary precedence that has gone on for many years at our school.

You'll be hearing more from me about this sooner rather than later...

Work Out

Ugh. I want to write this really long entry about American Gladiators but I've got work to do. I know, I know: "ENOCH, YOU'RE DOING WORK!?" It's readings that count toward something and therefore my philosophy of "doing as little as possible to get by." Sorry blog world, you're gonna have to hear about Helga tomorrow.

Party Of One

There's something about going to a restaurant alone thats really cool. It's basically a date with yourself, minus all the awkward asking out, the troublesome planning, the awkward "hello," the painful silence, the awkward silence... I'm beginning to sense a pattern. Sitting in a restaurant alone, your senses sharpen. Just you, your waiter, your food, and your thoughts. Occasionally, something happens around you that makes you look up, but generally it turns out to be nothing; back to your food.

Restaurants have always fascinated me. As avid readers of my blog may know, a lot of things fascinate me: buses, trains, planes, any method of transportation really, taser guns, stupid people, Hannah Montana, stupid people willing to do anything to see Hannah Montana, Starbucks barista girls, girls, people in general, fads, fashion, the entertainment industry, how Good Luck Chuck became a movie, why anyone thinks Dane Cook is funny, did I say Hannah Montana? The lists goes on and on. The notion of being able to look at a piece of folded cardboard or a white board with "Specials" in dry-erase marker, point to a number, and then have it appear in front of you in five minutes to an hour (I'm looking at you Johnny Farinas on Elgin) is mind-boggling. In addition, everyone sitting around you each has their own story and conversation and are generally cheerful thanks to the (hopefully) great food and drinks off of that folded piece of cardboard.

Everyone sitting down at a restaurant is equal; we are all at the mercy of the people preparing and serving our food. Therefore, everyone has to be at their best behavior. Of course, sometimes, you're in a group and the conversations turn loud, fast, and loose but generally, you have to be good to your hosts, otherwise you might end up with some unexpected additions to your plate.

No one likes an unexpected surprise.

Shout Out

Even though, I don't believe in "math" or "science" or "studying," I have to send a SHOUT OUT to two schools in Fairburn, Georgia who are starting up at 15-week pilot program that will pay underachieving students $8 an hour to attend a study hall. In order to be eligible, the forty students in grades eight and eleven (for now) must be "underperforming" in math and science. Aside from the sweet more-than-minimum wage, eight graders will get a $75 bonus and eleventh graders will get a $125 bonus if their marks are raised to a B. If all goes well, some kids stand to earn $605 during the semester.

How sweet is that!? All those aspiring student body presidents out there, take note: a promise to pay students for school is coming sooner rather than later! What will they come up with next? CLOWN COLLEGE!? Wait, you're telling me they already have that?

PILLS

If you read yesterday's blog, you may have noticed a glaring story omission. Unless you've been living under a rock and didn't catch the 24-hour Heath Ledger Death-A-Thon on CNN, Heath Ledger is dead. I don't want to brag, but I CALLED IT! Well, not the death part, no one could see that one coming, horrible tragedy and what not. What I did call was the story taking front page news over at our friends the Ottawa Sun.
WHOO! Biggest headline on the front page! They did not disappoint. Let's examine the stories that took the silver medal to "HEATH LEDGER DEAD AT 28 - Hollywood In Shock, Young Ottawa Co-Star 'Sad'" (check out the random "PILLS" at the bottom of that).

-Son Charged In Murder - Grizzly family murder story? FUCK THAT, LEDGER'S DEAD!
-Not Enough Jump - Surely, a losing local sports team must be bigger than a movie star dying? Guess again.
-The Manley Report on Afghanistan - The biggest story in the Citizen and really every other paper in Canada has been regulated to a header at the Ottawa Sun, with the writer's name and picture taking over 1/3rd of the header space.
-Plus All The Oscar Noms! - Can't forget the Oscar noms, even though you can barely see it on the front page.

And not a single mention of the world's ACTUAL biggest story: stock market turbulence. I guess that doesn't really sell papers; you have to spice it up. "STOCK MARKETS HIT TURBULENCE OVER TROUBLED PACIFIC OCEAN WHILE DODGING MISSILES. TWO DEAD, DOZENS INJURED."

Chi Tea

I've been drinking a lot of tea recently. I never drank tea (except iced tea) up until a few weeks ago and for those of you that have heard the "I'm really not that Asian" rant, not drinking tea was another item on the long list that makes me a disgrace to my culture (the biggest one being my inability to use chopsticks). I guess that's the product of a kid born and raised in Canada in two non-Asian cities. Another product of an Asian kid born and raised in Canada: I'm a monster. I mean have you seen normal Asian people? The average height is like 5'. 5' 5" at most if they ate their green beans as a kid. These people are really short. Me? 6'. Every single time I go see relatives or any of my parents' Asian friends, the first words out of their mouths (in Chinese) are "YU SOUL TALL!" I think it was something in the Canadian water which therefore leads me to believe that basketball's Yao Ming was secretly raised in Canada.

I've never been good at "fitting in" with my culture. When I was little, the only Asian people I saw were at church and at home. Even when I went to a Chinese restaurant in St. John's, the owner and all the patrons were all white. A "Chinese" dinner at "Hong Kong Restaurant" (that was the name, I swear to God) consisted of fried rice, chicken balls, egg rolls, and chicken noodle soup. It wasn't even Campbell's chicken noodle soup. Living here though, my family never eats that stuff when we go to Chinese restaurants. The one place that is a "Chinese-Canadian" restaurant here (Golden Palace on Carling. The egg rolls are to die for), my mother hates. I can understand why you hate that kind of food after growing up on it, and then moving to Canada and finding out that "Hong Kong Restaurant" was the only place in your town serving "Chinese food." It's sort of like growing up with daily neighborhood shootings and then moving out of Toronto. I can't let that one go.

Where was I? Oh yes. Tea. I've been drinking a lot of it recently and I'm finding it hard when you start out. There are so many kinds, especially at Starbucks. They all sound so deceivingly delicious too. "White Blueberry." "Passion." "Green Orange Passion." The reason I say deceivingly is because these flavors taste NOTHING like their advertised fruit and need at least 6 spoonfuls of sugar to help that medicine go down. When you say "can I have a regular tea?", they just look at you like an idiot and ask "what kind of tea?" because "regular" in the barista girl's mind means "tall." That information is handy for later when you ask the barista girl "do you wanna go out with a regular guy?"

"YU SOUL REGULAR!"

Atonement

I'm back, back from a month long "hiatus." Did you miss me? You did didn't you. Since you're probably reading this on Facebook notes, you're probably just glad that you're reading something that's NOT stolen from ________ because he/she is bored. So many reposted quizzes and surveys, so little time. It'll probably take a few days for me to get back into the swing of my blog things (I'd never thought I'd live to see the day I use "blog" in a dirty connotation), but a month off has offered a lot of stupid people in the news and the world around me to go unpunished (by my words).

First to atone: Last week, Toronto Mayor David Miller's call for an "absolute ban" on handguns in Canada. Weren't you supposed to do this like... forever ago? I mean, what made you all of a sudden come up with the bright idea? Could it be the two people that died from stray bullets in the past week in your city? Or the hundreds that die across your city and the near thousands that die all across Canada each year? While an "absolute ban" will actually never happen, it's about bloody time you're speaking up. Although I do understand why he didn't speak up before: he didn't want to get shot. Understandable. After all, he does live in Toronto.

Next to atone: The Razzie Awards, the awards that claim to "de-honour" Hollywood's worst movies has some explaining to do. I think I speak for everyone in demanding a recount when "Good Luck Chuck" was shut out from the major movie nominations. Have they even seen that piece of crap?

Call up the Atone Phone: Hollywood. What has this world come to when we can't even celebrate the achievements of our biggest stars by watching a gala on TV? Instead, Hollywood's biggest nights have turned into press conferences. If I want to see awards being given out without all the prestige that comes with an awards show, I'll watch MTV Video Music Awards, thank you very much. If I want to see awards given out without all the excitement, I'll watch the Governor General's Performing Arts Awards, thank you very much.

Lastly, atone: Hilary Clinton for (among other things) crying. America can't have (another) president that cries when faced with something tough. Crying, though, has gotten a lot of people in history what they want including:

He wants his bottle.
He wants Joey.I don't know what he wants.

Some Thing Has Found You

Coming tomorrow...

1-21-08